A Plea for Modesty

You hear woman and fathers trying to convince teenage girls to be modest all of the time. Especially fathers, who often (at least in the South) warn their daughters that any guy who gets caught looking at them will get shot. You rarely, though, hear this plea from a teenage boy. The reason is fairly obvious: most guys don't want girls to be modest. They want, wrong as it may be, to see as much as they can for the pleasure of their own hormonal minds. However, for guys who are trying to follow Jesus and enjoy a fruitful Christian walk, things are different. We desire holiness. We don't want to think impure things, to disobey Jesus and indulge in lustful fantasies. The sad part is, though, that our brains are still wired the same way. Just like the average guy, we have hormones and desires and thoughts that come out of nowhere. The difference is how we feel about these things, and how we react. While most guys embrace these things or even pursue them, we shun them. Nevertheless, we are but human, going through one of the most difficult stages of development. We find ourselves, like the Apostle Paul, calling out, "Oh, what a miserable person I am! Who will free me from this life that is dominated by sin and death?" (Rom. 7:24, NLT) Our problem lies in that our minds are, by nature, quick to react to many sights. While we try to fight it, and we call on the Lord to help, temptation is everywhere in our abominably sex-saturated culture. Christian girls don't help at all when they dress as immodestly (or even only somewhat better) than everyone else.

Many girls object to this plea with something like this: "Why should we have to hide ourselves because some guys can't control their thoughts?" I have three main points to bring up in response to this objection:

1. You're not losing out on anything by covering up. Style isn't worth creating temptation for Christian brothers. And really, what difference does it make otherwise to you? The truest beauty is found in spirit, and the most innocent physical beauty is found on the head. Girls complain about being called "hot" instead of "beautiful." I invite you to ponder why. If anything, the affect of modesty is good. The less you show off in your daily apparel (or swimwear), the more you have to delight your husband with for the first time one day.
2. Immodesty around teenage Christian brothers is like drinking around a recovering alcoholic. No one thinks it is cruel to keep even moderate drinks out of the sight of people who have been plagued by alcoholism and are trying to quit. This is the same kind of thing. Lust is as destructive as alcohol, and the holiness and purity sought by Christian guys is much harder to obtain when such powerful temptation surrounds. If you love your Christian brothers, you will try to avoid creating temptations for them.
3. The Apostle Paul set an example that you should follow. In the early church, a lot of dietary debates came up. Weak brothers in the faith would sometimes be tripped into sin as they violated their consciences by eating meat sacrificed to idols just because they saw other Christians doing it. Thus, Paul, in an attempt to help prevent his brothers in Christ from sinning, said in 1 Corinthians 8:13, "So if what I eat causes another believer to sin, I will never eat meat again as long as I live--for I don't want to cause another believer to stumble." He was willing to limit his personal liberties for the sake of the holiness of others. You should follow that example.

In conclusion, consider these last few verses that, to me, seem to address the objection raised before.

Romans 14:13 - "So let's stop condemning each other. Decide instead to live in such a way that you will not cause another believer to stumble and fall."

Romans 14:21 - "It is better not to eat meat or drink wine or do anything else if it might cause another believer to stumble."

1 Corinthians 10:32 (NIV) - "Do not cause anyone to stumble, whether Jews, Greeks or the church of God."

1 Timothy 2:9,10 -  "And I want women to be modest in their appearance. They should wear decent and appropriate clothing and not draw attention to themselves...For women who claim to be devoted to God should make themselves attractive by the good things they do."